lexi the fattie

so lately i've been struggling a little with being a fattie.

1. I EAT 24HOURS a day.

2. I exercise for at least 1HOUR each day.

but you see, after burning like a zillion (okay fine maybe not a zillion) calories jumping around, lifting weights & sweating like a (for lack of a better word) pig, I EAT.

& EAT

& EAT.

oh and... EAT

this is why i am still FAT. or as i like to say, AM STILL A FATTIE.

which now brings you to the depressing part of this post, I HATE BEING A FATTIE. i am so fat. 'no lex, you are not fat' 'serious alex, not fat' LIES! LIES! LIES!

my self esteem has hit an extreme low.

thank you skinny people.. really...

youth

i'm 15. pretty young really, but sometimes i do things that i shouldn't do. that people my age shouldnt be doing. i honestly should try and act my age.

August 15 2011

ahhahah i just read all my old posts. i was so caught up in old memories & was so damn heartbroken i couldnt even think straight.

WELL HERE I AM.

not as unhappy as before, but not as happy as i was before he happened.

.. BUT dont get me wrong, I AM CONTENT.

I AM HAPPY.

& all that 'time heals everything' shit. reaaally isnt shit. yes, time was all it took. time for me to realize that all things happen for a reason, time for me to step back and be thankful for all he taught me, time for me to realize that there are better things for me out there.

be it education or love.

:)